Throne of Spoilers: Spoils of War

The newest episode of Game of Thrones aired last night and I want to discuss everything about it. So, SPOILERS, please don’t look further if you haven’t seen it. You have been warned.
Oh. My. Drogon! It would take me years to tell you how much I loved this episode. There was so much going on, so let’s dive right in to this shallow lake in the middle of the desert.
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THE TYRELL GOLD
This episode begins in the desert, with the the Tyrell gold, and the question of the morality of Cersei’s methods. Ah, Jaime. Poor, delusional Jaime. He just wants to love his woman, but his woman is being so difficult. He’s in serious denial about it, too.
After all this time, Bronn has just received the love of his life: a pile of gold. But he’s still not getting the deal that he wanted, and even he is starting to be phased by some of the requests being made. He makes a begrudged quip to Jaime about The Queen’s rule, scoffing at the thought that she would be a peaceful monarch, which is something that Jaime needs to realize before he can finally betray her. Bronn has a little more character development this episode than Jaime, but I’ll get into that more when I talk about the battle.
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LITTLE TROUBLE WITH LITTLEFINGER
We then see Littlefinger with a traumatized Bran, and he gives his knife to him. Bran makes the “chaos is a ladder” comment, which Littlefinger recognizes immediately. Littlefinger will eventually realize what a danger that Bran could be to him, if Bran ever manages to pull his head out of his all-seeing butt, for now he simply left when Meera came in.
That moment with Meera was so heartbreaking, and, from what I’ve been told, so opposite to what happened in the books. When she said, “You died in that cave,” Bran just looks at her with those blank eyes and she leaves in tears. He is going to be of no use to anyone while he remains this lost and overwhelmed by his visions.
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THE PACK SURVIVES
Arya came back just in time to see how much of a jerk her brother has become! Seeing her in Winterfell was satisfying, though, and how she just stepped past the guards as they were squabbling was so classic.
I thought it was very clever writing that Sansa knew immediately where Arya would go, and went down to the tombs to meet her sister. Sansa’s meeting went better than expected, but it was good to see Arya becoming more human again. When she finally hugged her sister back, with some feeling and love, it warmed my cold, dead heart.
Arya and Bran have a scene where Bran gives her the knife that was meant to kill him, and Sansa sees that Arya’s “list” they that laughed about in the crypts is a real thing. When Arya and Brienne have their fight scene, both Sansa and Littlefinger see how powerful and strong Arya has become. Sansa even seems a little frightened by this revelation. Littlefinger’s story isn’t quite done yet, and my hypothesis is that Sansa may eventually have Arya kill him.
Now, to my favorite.
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FIRE + ICE = STEAM
Jon and Dany’s chemistry! We all know what happened the last time Jon Snow went in a cave, and seeing the Mother of Dragons that close to the King in the North, one could be forgiven for thinking it could happen, again. I held my hands up and tried pushing their heads together on the screen, quietly whispering, “Now kiss!” Didn’t happen, but the doe eyes they gave each other were of epic proportions.
What was especially interesting about this scene (other than my ship sinking) was the cave drawings of the Children of the Forest. These symbols have appeared several times throughout the show, but their meaning is unknown. Maybe it will become clearer as the show goes on, however, all that we really know is that these same symbols were used when the Children of the Forest created the Night King. I want to think that they will help, but these symbols just seem like they’re just laying around to make things more “magic-y”.
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DROGON USED FIRE BLAST — IT’S SUPER EFFECTIVE!!!
Best. Battle. Ever. This is the battle frequently glimpsed in the trailers, and other promotional images, but seeing the whole thing in action… That was a priviledge.
Bronn is trying to tell Jaime that they have to leave, and just when Jaime says they can deal with the Dothraki, Drogon comes in with Daenerys on his back. Bronn is forced to the Scorpion crossbow, and on his way gets unhorsed, all his gold is gone, and his weapons are taken. I thought he was going to die. I was so angry that they were going to kill him off, I love Bronn! Even so, I waved goodbye, and accepted his fate. He refused to run from the battle, and he… Lived? Hm. The writers are going soft. He finally makes it to the Scorpion and has this awesome, brave moment where he actually brings down a dragon. Doesn’t kill him, but he hits him hard.
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REASONS WHY JAIME ISN’T IN RAVENCLAW
Bronn’s attack made Jaime think that he could end the war by killing Dany. She’s on the ground trying to pull the massive spear out of Drogon’s shoulder, and Jaime decides it would be a goodq idea to try and kill her while she’s out in the open. Jaime wants to add something heroic to the Book of Knights, as his section is rather light. More so than that, he wants to end the war and go back to his sister, and make everything normal again. Understandable. Moronic, but understandable. As expected, the dragon turns to defend it’s mother…
And Bronn once again saves the life of a Lannister! Seriously, Bronn’s the best. (Some people think it might have been Dickon that saved him, but watch it in slow-mo, it’s Bronn.)
Jaime sinks in his heavy armor under the water, and the screen goes black so we can see the reflection of our horrified faces.
WHAT NOW?
Next stop everything. Now, Dany is going to make her formal “join me or die” speech, Jaime is most likely going to be saved from death by his brother, and Bronn better live or I will have words with the showrunners. He deserves something better than beheading, come on.
Also, GENDRY. That’s right, the champion of rowing and abs, is said to come back in the 5th episode. What has he been up to? Has he gotten hotter? Will he and Arya make cute little murderous babies? Only time will tell.
In the trailer for episode 5, we know that Jon is responding to a raven about the walkers nearly making it to East-Watch-By-The-Sea, and he’s going to respond to that as quickly as possible. My theory is that the walkers waited this long to come back because they needed a winter cold enough to freeze the seas. They’re gonna walk over to East-Watch-By-The-Sea and go right around. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the wall during the beginning credits. Doesn’t the sea around it look a little… White?
Join me next week for my frantic ramblings, and Valar Dohaeris.

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